Hasty Words (https://hastywords.wordpress.com/)  has inspired me to post a picture of what I realllllly look like. So here are some pictures of me shopping at Lowes and looking absolutely crazy.

I looked so good the other day. Then this trip to the store happened. I feel so out of place here with all of the appliances and tools. I rarely venture beyond the home organizing section and the paint section. There aren’t any shoes here, are there? I wonder if they have rain boots.

Anyway, I think I hate it here. But I think I should make friends with the worker bees. They know how to work sanders and I don’t. They have knowledge that I want to have.

I have stalked this vacuum so I know that it’s on sale. So here I am defending my territory.

No wonder no one wanted to wait on me or fight me for the last vacuum.  I could probably turn them to stone with my Medusa-like hair and red eyes. My eyes are really greenish but who is going to notice?

Still waiting. It’s been more than ten minutes since I’ve seen a worker bee. Oh wait. There might be one over there!!

No. Foiled again. I’m ready for a nap.

Yay! Finally an angel of mercy has come to rescue me!! I mean . . . the manager came over to assist me with my purchase. He has saved me from making myself look like a jerk by rolling the vacuum up and down the aisle.Seriously, I was moments away from doing just that very thing.

I tweeted about it and Lowes Customer Care noticed. They said he gets a present for being real. Plus a gold star on his record. It’s totally going in his personnel file.