I Should Put On Clothes

It probably won’t happen. I mean, I could find some pants and maybe a shirt. There are lots of clothes over there in the closet, which is not a real closet. It’s a rack with clothes.

Today, I don’t know if clothes will change my mood. If I put on that little black dress and pearl necklace will I feel like a likeable person?

Will people come over if I put on pants? Will I be more charming if I’m wearing clothes?

Nope. I will still be kind of chubby and socially awkward. It’s not likely to change anytime soon.

So screw that whole wearing clothes thing. I might as well walk around in my underwear and be totally vulnerable.

I don’t think I could be a complete nudist. Is there a “Walking Around in Your Underwear” group or commune. Do you think they would let me join their underwear party?

I wonder if my neighbors can see in the windows. It could be a conversation starter. Maybe they’ll bring wine or ice cream. I accept both.

Just saying, please come over so we can sit around in our underwear and eat ice cream. This could be interpreted as “I’m lonely and need more social interaction without wearing pants but also not totally naked.”

Also, please help me find my copy of “Magic Mike.” Channing Tatum has been my best friend this weekend.

P.S. If you think I have gone off the deep end, you’re probably right.

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About holley4734

I could be the worst cook in America. My boyfriend tells his friends about my cooking disasters. I'm glad someone is amused. I like movies, music, comic books and corny jokes. View all posts by holley4734

7 responses to “I Should Put On Clothes

  • Yvonne

    Clothes pick up my mood but i have to say, your underwear gathering with icecream would totally work too!!! Id be in that

  • annette.c.boehm

    over here it’d be too cold for that… in fact, it’s gotten so cold (relatively speaking — i mean, i barely moved back here after 4 years of mississippi heat) that i’m acutely aware i need warmer clothing. which i shall try and take care of today. i really don’t like clothes shopping — i’m tall, broad-shouldered, and not the type for mid-riff showing, which makes finding shirts that are long enough (and wide enough) a pain in the backside. whoever decided that the only difference between m, l, and xl should be the width of the garment is a complete idiot and probably wears, like, a size xs so their ignorance is forgiveable, though still annoying. lol.

    • Yvonne

      Hun, I live in Australia, and know what you mean about heat but I have a suggestion re clothes for tall and broad shoulders goddessle like you and me… Try Long tall sally. They do take ages to arrive (Being based in the UK) but they are designed for the Tall lady and their waists sit properly. You will have to convert to US sizing but generally its a size down to get to US. eg 16UK is 14USA etc etc etc. Hope this helps as they have lots of jackets that will cover your rear this coming winter XOXO

  • wscottling

    I never could walk around in just my underwear… it feels incredibly awkward to me. Naked under a towel, yes. Underwear, no. Underwear and a t-shirt, now we’re talking.

    Can’t help you with the Magic Mike thing… I don’t even own a copy of my own. Yeah, that wasn’t an awkward sentence. >_> I should get around to watching that some day.

  • Henrietta M Ross

    I can come over, with clothes, no ice cream. Horrid stuff. Cookies?

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