I should totally be sleeping right now. Someone didn’t take their melatonin today. That stuff works.
While at work, I think about weird things like challenging my boyfriend to a thumb wrestling contest. He would totally win but I would lose less than I would have a month ago. If I didn’t have a strong grip before, I do now. Thanks for that buffers.
My mom told someone that I spray paint cars. It sounds illegal. Thanks for the street cred mom.
On the plus side, I’m got more money than Kanye. hahahaha. I know, probably not in reality. Kanye is more of a jerk now that he’s poor. Who knew that was even possible?
My youngest let me dress her up for a photo shoot. Someday soon she won’t let me take pictures of her. So I have to do it before she runs screaming from the room when I get the camera out.
I would like to change the sign at work to say “Zero Fcks given.” Now it says something about zero and teamwork and something else positive.
If I have flipped you off this week at around 7 a.m., I’m not sorry. Quit tailgating me jerk. I’m not a violent person but I would like to shoot your tires out. This is also why I don’t have a gun. Just looking out for your tires and personal well-being. You’re welcome.
If I flipped you off in the drop off lane at school, also not sorry. Quit parking in the driving lane . . . just quit.
How was your week? Hopefully, you’re sleeping well.
P.S. I just looked up the side effects of melatonin. Irritability. No kidding. . . . Imagine if I didn’t sleep. Oh wait. I don’t always. I’ve been up for almost 24 hours. . . .
If we were having coffee, I would tell you . . .
– It’s the 7th anniversary with the boyfriend. He bought me some rum. I bought him bacon. It’s probably why we have made it this long.
-The pipes froze. Again.
This is what it looked like at sunrise today.
– I’m still working midnights. I will probably never love my job. It’s a means to an end.
– I may have farted in someone’s general direction. She has really bad body odor and attention-seeking behavior. There could be a connection. Anyway, I did not feel bad about the gas. I’m just trying to survive the body odor and the fact that i have to wear an ugly apron and safety goggles.
-If the pipes don’t unfreeze, I will also have an issue with body odor. Not to mention the gas issue.
-I bought some Dunkin Donuts coffee creamer. Caramel. Mmmm. Hoping it’s good.
-My mom is back from vacation. There will be a trip to see her soon.
-What are you doing!?
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– That I have not been 100% sure of the actual day is for two weeks or so.
– This week, I’ve been waking up in a panic because I think that I’m supposed to be somewhere or there are spoilers on my dresser for me to fix. Then I realize that it’s a Nintendo system and not a car part.
– I was awake at 3 am today – I think- so I transcribed an interview by hand. It’s easier than typing on a tablet. Crazy, I know.
– Still obsessing about “Hannibal.” There is a saw at work that sounds like the elk in “Hannibal.” I am looking for a new obsession.
– I can do most things left and right handed. Except scrape ice off windows. It’s more of a short person problem. Also, I don’t golf left-handed. I already have a set of clubs that I don’t use. I don’t have room for two sets.
– My brother is getting married to his super cute boyfriend. I have been invited to the engagement party.
– For a second, I thought everyone on earth will get married before me. My second thought was “Suckers.” Then I laughed myself to sleep.
– Hopefully, you are all doing well and getting enough sleep.
I wake up in the morning and watch it. I fall asleep watching it at night.
It could be because of this guy.
I want him to be my friend but I don’t want him to make me into coffee.
We are also not psychopaths or sociopaths. I googled it. I have also profiled most of my friends and hardly any of them are psychopaths.
Lucas and I have been making lots of jokes about putting the lotion in the basket. We really do have a lotion basket. Good times.
Since last week, I’ve been working 3rd shift at a factory. There’s a virgin tank there. I don’t know what it’s for but I really, really want to take a picture of it. I’m positive that I’m not a worthy candidate for the virgin tank sacrifice.
However, photography is probably against the rules so I’ll wait a month or so.
Other than that, I’ve spent a lot of time sleeping and looking for my keys. Apparently, the percentage of misplacing my keys has increased by 110% since the shift change.
Coffee has been a lifesaver, except now I drink it at 8 p.m. instead of 8 a.m.
How have you guys been? I haven’t been around much but hopefully that will change.
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